Monday 3 August 2009

Ok, I retract what I've said earlier....

Oi!!! Where is my train????

First and foremost, I would like to apologise to the public for making a misleading and unguided review on the KTM service. There are no longer any comfortable trains like the one I have shown in the previous post, they have replaced the trains with the normal commuter train (yes, the shit, smelly and narrow train we use everyday), dragged by the old engines.

The KTM service now has gone from worst to the condition far worse than worst. I'm not talking about the train delays for it has become too common until I'm so used to wait for the train that I could sleep while standing. This time, the thoughtful KTM management team is providing free and natural "in-train sauna baths" for the commuters at random hours. Just last week alone, I have the opportunity to enjoy the "sauna bath" ...TWICE! How lucky....


Sauna the KTM type, "cheap for the commuters, no cost for the management"

  • You will be placed in a tiny, non- air conditioned space overcrowded with tonnes of sweaty commuters.
  • You shall enjoy the body odours instead of the sweet aromatic scent from the herbs and flowers. Researchers in Malaysia have found out that body odours have healing effects and contain no harmful chemicals found in herbal remedies. It's 100% natural and free!
  • The weather in Malaysia is the heat source of the sauna. No infrared, charcoal or other matrials are required to produce the heat. It's 100% natural and free!!!

Sounds interesting? There's more.....

Here's some interesting information to know about the KTM:

KTM, The Unique Train service only found in Malaysia

  • When the KTM management team is given the task to "upgrade" the service, you should expect the service to become worse rather than being improved. By doing this, you will avoid disappointment and anger which is not good for your health. KTM management has recently "upgraded" their service with more delays and breakdowns.
  • A train service is available every 15 minutes on non-peak hours. On peak hours, a train is made available depends on the driver's mood. They can choose to come every 30 minutes, 45 minutes, forever or cancel the service without any notice.
  • For Malaysians, "to queue" is to obstruct people from coming out from the train. When you hear the announcement "please queue at the red line", prepare to form a barrier with other Malaysians to stop the passengers from coming out from the train!
  • The ticket machines are built to annoy and frustrate the commuters instead of saving their time and easing the queue. The machines will only accept the notes (money) after 1350 trials. Providing new notes will not solve the problem as the machine will still reject your money.
Words alone are not enough to describe the wonders of KTM. I strongly encourage everyone out there to visit Malaysia and experience it yourself. You'll be amazed at what our "Kereatapi Terunik Malaysia (KTM)"...(translated as "Malaysia's Most Unique Train") can offer!!

Note: The KTM is not for those with a weak heart and mind...Take it at your own risk

Now we know why the train is always late....it's human powered...Malaysia boleh!!!

No comments: